Loving Me

Hey all,

Okay...I know it's been a minute since my last post, probably TOO long but you know how the saying goes "Life is what happens while making other plans."
So rather than wasting time with excuses or various excerpts from my nonexistent social life, how about we get right into it? Sounds good to you? Okay! The topic I chose for July (and since we're at the end of this month...August as well)

Self Esteem: Loving Yourself Completely

Take a moment to let that settle in your heart and mind. How many of us are struggling with this issue on a daily basis? Do we ever reach a point where we are comfortable with who we are completely? Can we all truly look into the mirror and love the person staring back at us (inside and out) even on our worse days? What should we do when we don't feel so beautiful, secure, loved, accepted, or etc? How do you rebuild a broken person?

A simple solution for some would be... possibly getting together with a couple of friends, where you'll maybe have yourself a good cry over a cup of coffee, and then polishing off the evening with an empowering message or two from each person (round table style of course)about what makes you so incredibly awesome and finally a group hug to recharge your battery so you can face the world again. Two phone calls, a lunch date, and crises averted. Sounds easy right? Yes, it's great when you have a loving family or understanding group of friends who can pick you up when the chips are down. But some people don't have the luxury of a good support system. What should those people do when faced with a case of the "blues?"

I arrived at this topic while listening to a resounding outcry from my friends and other people I've crossed paths with this year. It's an issue that has been talked about on many levels but due to the rise in unemployment, other economic woes, and unrealistic standards that are set by media, more people are seriously starting to struggle with fostering a healthy self image.

My aim for this month, is to attempt to touch on all the topics that truly hinder us from loving ourselves no matter the situation, life path, or circumstance.

Please stay tuned... much more to come.

In the meantime, check out these poems by
Dana Gilmore


Wife, Woman, Friend Pt. 1


Wife, Woman, Friend Pt. 2



Let's Elevate?

Black History Month

"Freedom is never given; it is won." -A. Philip Randolph.

I really meant to post this sooner. Like most of my past blog posts, I planned write out a detailed article on the importance of this time but I only have a few minutes so here we go! This year like every year in February we pause to recognize, remember, and celebrate Black History Month. A time where we can salute the great strides that have been gained since 1926 when it first originated by historian Carter G. Woodson as "Negro History Week". Woodson chose the second week of February because it marked the birthdays of two Americans who greatly influenced the lives and social condition of African Americans: former President Abraham Lincoln and abolitionist and former slave Frederick Douglass. Long gone are the days where Black and White people could not sit next to one another on the bus, at the movies, or in a classroom.


Who would have guessed or imagined back then that we would now have a Black president? Recently, on January 31, 2010 Caressa Cameron, a 30 year old Black female from Fredricksburg, Virginia was crowned Miss America. She was the fifth Black woman to receive this coveted honor. How inspiring and profoundly amazing! There is still "a ways" to go but I believe that if we (not only Blacks and Whites but all nationalities) keep moving forward we shall indeed "overcome."

Black History Month sheds a light on issues that need to be addressed and challenges us to continue to rise above injustices, Ethnic intolerance, and any other acts that do not productively serve our great goal which is peace and fairness. Please take a few moments to remember what was done and what still needs to be done to make this world a better place for our children and generations to come. To all of you making history.... Thank you and continue to fight the good fight!

In closing I'd like to leave you with this poem. Let's keep hope alive, live the dream, and Elevate!




Julian Curry - Niggers Niggas & Niggaz


photos by Newham you can find them here

Hope! Healing! Love for Haiti!

Over the past few weeks since the tragic earthquake that has devasted the nation of Haiti, there's been one fluid thought that has flowed through my mind and through my heart ... HOPE for the HEALING for the people of Haiti. We can only imagine how hard it must be to muster up the courage to have hope in light of what they face. The Word of God tells us to "rejoice with those who rejoice and to sorrow with those who sorrow" Today Haiti we sorrow with you! We share your losses and we share your pain! We also HOPE to share one day JOY again! We pray for you, we cry for you, we care for you and we HOPE! We HOPE and we believe in the restoration of JOY and PEACE! But not back to the lives you used to have but to an even better life ... not just an existance but LIFE! Accept our love, our prayers and our hopes for you Haiti!

If You Weren’t Afraid

It's been a while since my last post. Sorry about that guys, I guess I needed some time to retreat, regroup, and reconnect to my inner self. 2009 was a tough year for me and I'm almost sure I'm not alone in feeling that way. Now that 2010 is in full swing I think it's a good idea to start over with some fresh ideas.
So.. without further ado let's get right into it.

Most mornings I meditate. I may not go through the whole ritual of burning incense or sitting in lotus position while channeling my
"Inner Buddha" however... I do set aside time each day purely for mental relaxation. I'm saying all this to say while in deep thought today I've finally arrived at this month's topic and it is FEAR. That ugly four letter word that can make or break our dreams. To me to live with fear is far worse than any movie directed by M. Night Shyamalan or any monster concocted in the imaginative mind of Stephen King. To be afraid is to be captive of your own self created prison. But for whatever reason we all gladly accept our fate with not so much as a whimper of protest. And so the question I put before each of you today is

What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

Now, take about 10 minutes and really think about this question. I'll wait.... Kick your feet up and allow yourself to play "make believe" the way you did when you were six or seven. Think about the way you lived before you realized there was a possibility of your dreams not materializing. Imagine how you lived before you cared if your shoes matched, if you lost a tooth, or if your best friend was Republican or Democrat. What would you (really) do if you had no fear?

• Would you quit your job as a jet setter and become a street performer?

• Would you drive an Harley even though you live in a Eco-friendly neighborhood?

• Would you approach that hot next door neighbor who has been giving you the eye all week?

• Would you call an estranged relative and make a peaceful overture?

• Would you tell someone you loved them?

• Would you quit your job and start your own business?

• Would you end a relationship that isn’t serving your highest good?

• Would you have a child?

• Would you ask for help?

Perhaps you'd get that tattoo.. or go skydiving?


What stops you from living the best possible life that you can live? I think it really boils down to fear. Fear that if we change we won't be accepted by our peers, family, or love ones. Fear that if we quit that cushy job at the law firm and we don't keep up appearances we'll be doomed to live in squalor. Fear of death, poverty, rejection, humiliation, or loneliness. The list goes on. So what then do we choose as a result of letting this fear rule our lives? Discontent? Restlessness? Let's not forget the constant "what ifs."

Most of it is not fear at all... it's just excuses. I'm sure you've all heard the saying that if you repeat a lie enough times you'll soon start to believe it yourself. Sometimes we talk ourselves out of our greatest destiny due to unrealistic appending doom which we're sure will certainly find us if we travel outside of our comfort zones. But if we don't test our limits then how would we know what we are fully capable of and whether or not it's what we truly want? Let's face it, success requires risk and sacrifice. Those are two major components that are more often than not accompanied by fear. What are you willing to do differently about your fears in 2010?

I plan to explore this topic even deeper but I'll stop here today. Ask yourself... what's stopping you and if it's fear challenge yourself to stare it right in the face and do it anyway. You can change your life.. it's your choice.


In the meantime.. Check out this poem by Marianne Williamson entitled
"Our Deepest Fear." No matter how many times I hear it, I still come away feeling inspired and re-energized. I hope it does the same for you. Until next time..

Let's elevate?



Credits: The Fear photo (pictured above) in this article was found through google here.
I'm not sure who created it. Youtube video by estari4life her page and videos can be found here.

Event Today!

Since our focus this month is on Relationships, I felt it was only fitting to have a discussion about them (on & off the grid) Don't be shy. Come on out and support! Let's elevate?

Relationships: Friends

Choosing the first topic to blog about for August was difficult. I mean, I realize there's a million other subjects that need to be addressed. I am fully aware of the many Social and Economic ills that plague our communities and I truly hope to take some time to touch on as many as I can. Elevate (the blog, the place, and the group) is all about healing and connecting. I can't speak for everybody but my desire first, above anything I share on this site, is that you (the readers) will grow. It doesn't matter how that growth manifests itself whether it's through thoughts, feelings, spoken word or any form of self expression. The goal here is build. Now, on to the Topic for this month.



"Relationships"
Friendship

Yesterday I had a really insightful and inspiring conversation with a dear friend of mine. We discussed a slew of topics but the one that really stuck with me is when we spoke about friendship. We all have had our share of good and bad relationships in that area, right?
So how do we determine what's working and what isn't? Sometimes it takes for something tragic to happen in our lives for it to be revealed to us who is true. Sometimes it's just a gut feeling. I long for the days when friendship was simply sharing the other half of a Snickers bar and a "falling out" meant that friend couldn't sit next to you in the lunch room. When did it all get so complicated?


I found this quote in an article written by Stephen Ernst entitled Poisonous Relationships: People we hang around can kill our destiny.

He writes:

We need to remember – who we allow into our lives – will either:

- help destroy our destiny
- or inspire us to fulfill our destiny

So which type of friend are you? I am a firm believer that you teach people how to treat you. I find that if people see that you won't stand for negativity then eventually they will stop bringing it your way. I surround myself with those that not only share in my joys when I am successful but encourage me and hold me accountable when I am not doing the things that will lead me towards my destiny. I can't say that this is the formula for forming the best possible lifelong bonds but it's working for me. I challenge you to look at your relationships this month and explore what works for you. Let's elevate.




In the meantime here's a poem by Bassey Ikpi
"Sometimes Silence Is The Loudest Kind Of Noise"

QiQi this one is for you... thank you for sharing your journey with me.











artwork "Friendship"
by Gosia Gajewska
view more or purchase here

who am I?

I am not going to dig too far into this issue because it's been discussed in-depth for centuries. But on a personal note, for over a month or so I (Vertigo Verb) have been on a self exploration about who I am and where I fit in society. It's funny but now at the near completion of my quest for knowledge and a deeper understanding of my community sadly, I've only arrived at more questions. For example... What is good hair? What is speaking Black or acting White? What truly defines race or culture? Where do the lines begin and end? I mean, what if you're like me (bi-racial) Where do we "fit" or "belong" in society? Let's say you were a Caucasian girl brought up in a African American (It's difficult being so P.C.) household does that define who you are or will be? Who defines what is beautiful? And who wrote all these unwritten laws of behavior that everyone seems to subconsciously follow? Ah so many questions.

I was speaking with a friend of mine two days ago, swapping stories about our childhoods. We grew up similar households. Both with Mother and Father present, possessing secondary education, and the occasional family trips. By having parents with decent priories it afforded us better opportunities in education and pretty much our overall quality of day to day life. Instead of being embraced by our community we were teased and ridiculed. Singled out as either "Boojee" or "trying to act White." She even shared with me a story about how she would deny where she was from in her attempt to be accepted. I mean since when did having both parents in a home become a luxury? Since when did being able to go to a school where the likely hood of getting gunned down is less than average become a character flaw?

Can somebody please help me understand????

And what the hell is Good Hair?


Here is a poem I found to be both entertaining and informative.


Let's Elevate?

"White" Nafessa Monroe

also if you enjoyed that poem check out Zora Howard's poem called "Bi-Racial Hair"

here